My mind was already scattered, then to throw snow and cold winds in the picture was not good. The week was full enough of mix-ups and turmoil, now let’s put away the new clothes line, pretend Christmas is coming and put up the lights, woohoo.
Life is tough enough, then it throws another hard ball at us just to see how much we can handle. Because of all the side effects this chemo drug is giving me, my doctor here called my doctor in Halifax to see what could be done. He told her to give me the choice, either stop the chemo and see if the side effects go away or stay the same, or stay on the chemo and keep going after the cancer and see if the side effects stay the same or get worse.
But they will not get any better while I'm on the drug. It’s all about the quality of life. No it’s not, it’s about killing the cancer, that's why I'm trying this new drug so we can find out what we have to go through on the drug until it gets to the point that it kills the cancer and saves lives. So I told her I'm going with the drug, I will handle the side effects because if I stop the drug then the cancer will have a chance to grow like crazy.
So I’ve got my hard fight on again, throw it at me because I will find a way to fight back. I didn't fight 14 years to give up now.
The side effects of the drug so far: my hands go numb and my finger tips tingle, my hands feel like sandpaper but if anyone touches them they say how soft they are, even under my fingernails. A few fingers hurt so bad I have to take Tylenol to stop the pain. I feel like I fell in an anthill and can't get out (it takes a lot of mind control to stop that one). One side of my head pains but not like a headache. My bladder got smaller and I am having trouble with the water works. If I kneel down I can't get up without some help (some days I can do lunges and it’s OK). My hand is starting to shake and at night I have body jumps (but some of this comes with age). It was only a few weeks ago I started at the gym, now I'm having a hard time doing anything. It's like one good day then the next is a bad day.
I went to the hospital every day this week except Monday.
I went for blood work on Tuesday and also a doctor’s appointment. Wednesday I had to get chemo, Thursday I saw the surgeon about my toe. Then Friday I get an X-ray on my hand. It could be worse, there could be needles involved, ha.
When I went to town the other day I stopped in the new store, the Bargain Boss. It has everything. They've just been open a few weeks now, so they are still adding to their stock. This week they added artificial flowers that looked so good I thought they were real and had to go and touch them. They are next to the tea shop. (Did you try the Chaga tea yet?) The Bargain Boss is setting up their website so you can see what’s new. It is in the building that used to be Curves. Check it out, you will find everything from food to TVs there. The workers are very friendly.
Well I tried to drink a week of water, I'll give it another try next week because I didn't do so well. Actually I didn't make it a day, I tried, I had two glasses this week. I hate water, but you should start the day with a glass of warm or hot water to get all your system up and running.
Today is Thomas's birthday, woohoo, 14. Happy birthday Thomas. I'll give you lots of hugs when I go to Amherst.
The 25th is my son-in law's birthday, woohoo, have a happy birthday Dave, love you – 31, you’re getting up there.
Weight-wise: Up a bit and I didn't even have any Easter chocolate, but I am eating food more so that may be it.
I'm not sure if Dad and Janet are coming over this week or not, I hope, so I miss them.
Tip of the week: When you go to bed put hand cream on your feet, after a few days you will notice how soft they are getting. But be careful if you get up through the night that you don't slip. It should be safe by morning, it will be all soaked into your skin.
Have a good week folks… I saw tulip buds coming up in town, woohoo.
Kathy Golemiec is undergoing cancer treatments and writes about her experiences each week.